I knew it was coming for a long time. It doesn’t even take looking back to know that. The owner and I didn’t have the same personality type, something she had told me in a meeting and that she didn’t like how friendly I was with customers.
In the end though there is nothing that you can do in these sort of situations where personalities clash and you have to scramble. We are all going to be in that position once. There are ways to deal with it and me being me, I had to come up with a few steps to get me going again (Which don’t burn bridges).
Step One: Write it down.
Or say it out loud. Verbalize it. Not “I got let go”. No. Say you got fired. Once you vent it out, write it down and see what comes out. Writing the entire thing down will anchor you to the reality and help you to move forward.
Step Two: Staycation.
No, you cant go on a vacation right now because you just lost your job and vacations require money. (Or maybe you can. In which case awesome.) But you can take a few minutes to grieve and breath. Its tempting just to rush out but like a bad smell, your grief and mental trauma over getting fired will linger around you in your attitude and mannerisms. Take a breath and take the time to reconnect with you. I started my morning running routine again, made my meals and played with my dog, worked on my on line nutrition course and read the book I have been meaning to finish for months.
Step Three: Unbind that Inner You
When I date, the thing that I hate the most is that we tend to define ourselves by our occupation. “Hi my name is Erika and I work at yada yada yada.”
You are so much more than your job. It is time to remember that and not feel like a failure because things didn’t work out. This is especially true for people that have been in their jobs for a long time. Figure out what the other things that you like are. Be totally honest with yourself about how you feel, how you felt, and where you want to go. Journal is something that I always find helpful.
The most important thing to remember here is that your worth and your value as a human being has nothing to do with your job. The people that love you will continue to love you in spite of not having that job anymore.
Step Four: Actually Enjoy Indeed
I know, the idea of job hunting websites is cringe worthy…but not when you treat it sort of like you treat Zillow. Look at jobs and figure out what you want. Imagine your dream job where you don’t have panic attacks because you ran out of bread or some d-bag on yelp decided to post a 2 star review because you didn’t smile at him as you burnt your hand on 200 degree water. Look through them and figure out what it was in your old job that you liked and what is is that you would like to change. I’m not saying you have to buy the house (Take the job) but it never hurts to see whats on the market right now.
Step Five: Think Forward
Take a few steps a day to figure out what is actually going to make you feel fulfilled. Moving towards what you want next. You’ve paid your homage to the past you in the first few steps and now its time to think about the future.
It doesn’t have to be a hard core get to the next level plan, unless that is what you want to do. Just make sure you have a few steps a day of what you want to do to move forward. Want to write a blog post a day? Want to catch up with that customer you talked to but never got a chance to really TALK to?