Never Leave the House Without Your Mascara On

This is some advice that my grandmother gave me that really hit home.  You see my Grandma is 87 years old and a few weeks ago she had a stroke.  You know what she did in the ambulance?  She put her damn eye makeup on!  At first, I was like “What the hell grandma!?”  But she laughed and shook her head and told me she has been putting on her eye makeup every day since she was 17 years old and she didn’t intend to stop now.  That when she went out she just prayed that it was after she had made up her face.

First of all, I can’t imagine my life without my grandmother in it, even though I know that its something that will probably happen sooner rather than later.  She is the best person in the world and one of those people that is always there when you need her.  She raised my dad and his five brothers and sisters and then proceeded to be a positive driving force in all of her grandchildren’s lives.  All the while maintaining herself and being a stunning, outspoken, brave and passionate woman.  No matter how many mistakes I’ve made I could always count on my cheeks being stained and made infinitely better by the red lipstick marks on my cheeks.

Yes, I know.  Its a totally sweet story but it got me thinking about something adult and what it means to be put together like my grandma.  I am not the most put together person.  I will openly admit that.  But I know its important and something that we all should be conscious of.

Why?  Well, there are a few reasons why.  First of all, you never know who you are going to run into when you go out.  Future spouse?  Maybe but I’m thinking more a potential client or even your boss.  Do you really want to run into your boss with crusty eyes and Tweety Bird pajama pants?  I don’t.  So here are a few basic things that you should do before you leave the house so that you dont look like you’re doing the walk of shame across a college quad.  Maybe being that girl in college was cool but in your 30’s or even late 20s, it’s no longer cute.

Put on Real Pants:  I shouldn’t have to say this but I know I do.  If there is one thing that I can’t stand its when people leave the house in their pajama pants.  It’s trashy and hows that you put zero effort into yourself.  Come to think of it unless you are on your way to the gym or yoga pants, dont wear yoga pants either.  You aren’t a professional athlete.  Basically, judge it by this:  Would you want to be in a photo?

Hygiene: Do the basics and don’t put them off regardless of if you’re going to the gym or walking to the mailbox.  Wash your face, brush your teeth and hair, put on some deodorant.    Everyone that you run into will thank you for it.

Tame those Tatas: Ladies, for the love of god, wear a bra!  Unless you are 90 pounds and a -A cup, you should be wearing a bra.  Heck even if you have no boobs, those little nipple outlines in your shirt are going to make everyone uncomfortable.

Clean Clothing:  Really enough said right?  Make sure your clothes are clean.  If you’re like me you can carry a tide pen.

A Little Make-Up Never Hurt:  Now I’m not saying that you need to be like Grandma Spad and be made up every single time you leave your bedroom and you certainly dont need to be nightclub-ready, but a little mascara can go a long way.  At the very least make sure that you don’t have any crusties under your eyes from the night before.

The Face Bush:  For the gentlemen, I know that I shouldn’t be saying this and this is my personal opinion but I like a put together man.  So unless you’re on a beach, you should be wearing a shirt.  If you have a beard, make sure its trimmed and tamed before you eave the house.  You can get away with a lot more then a woman can (Again, I’m a bit biased) but that still doesn’t mean you should go out looking like you just rolled out of bed.

There you have it.  Simple, basic rules to leave the house by.  Of course, if you’re in your house, you don’t have to wear real pants (Or any pants at all for that matter if anyone you live with is okay with that).  But generally speaking, this should be stuff you do before you so much as wander to the grocery store when you realize you’re out of eggs.  Not only that but let’s be real, you’re going to feel a lot better if you don’t feel like greasy, just rolled out of bed crap.

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